Willis & Angie

“Betty and the Bar”

By Unknown Author

In a pioneer’s cabin out West, so they say,
A great big black grizzly trotted one day,
And seated himself on the hearths and began
To lap the contents of a two gallon pan
Of milk and potatoes,—an excellent meal,—
And then looked, about to see what he could steal.
The lord of the mansion awoke from his sleep,
And, hearing a racket, he ventured to peep
Just out in the kitchen, to see what was there,
And was scared to behold a great grizzly bear.

So he screamed in alarm to his slumbering frau,
“Thar’s a bar in the kitchen as big’s a cow!”
“A what?” “Why, a bar!” “Well murder him, then!”
“Yes, Betty, I will, if you’ll first venture in.”
So Betty leaped up, and the poker she seized.
While her man shut the door, and against it he squeezed,
As Betty then laid on the grizzly her blows.
Now on his forehead, and now on his nose,
Her man through the key-hole kept shouting within,
“Well done, my brave Betty, now hit him agin,
Now poke with the poker, and’ poke his eyes out.”
So, with rapping and poking, poor Betty alone
At last laid Sir Bruin as dead as a stone.

Now when the old man saw the bear was no more,
He ventured to poke his nose out of the door,
And there was the grizzly stretched on the floor,
Then off to the neighbors he hastened, to tell
All the wonderful things that that morning befell;
And he published the marvelous story afar,
How “me and my Betty jist slaughtered a bar!
O yes, come and see, all the neighbors they seed it,
Come and see what we did, me and Betty, we did it.”